How to rebuke someone biblically
Because we humans are self-willed and prone to tell and embrace lies, we have to help each other by pointing out where we've gone off course. This i...

Because we humans are self-willed and prone to tell and embrace lies, we have to help each other by pointing out where we've gone off course. This is called a rebuke, and few Christians do it well.
There is a fine art to rebuking someone. Generally speaking, it is important to not shame the person, so a rebuke should almost never be in front of others or in such a way that the person is left to lick his wounds. Let's look at how Jesus did it.*
One day, a Pharisee insinuates that Jesus is a phony. How will Jesus respond? Does he go after him with his rhetorical bazooka and call him a white-washed sepulcher? How to confront this man? Jesus doesn't want to shame him and in fact wants to help him grow. Jesus deftly accomplishes this with a quick story and a question:
"Simon, I have something to tell you."
"Tell me teacher."
"Two men owed money to a certain money lender…which of them will love him more?"
After Simon answers, Jesus affirms him: "…You have judged correctly"
From this brief interaction, we can extract the following five principles:
- A rebuke is required or a lie will persist. The process of spiritual growth involves weeding out lies. We live unaware of them.
- Get permission. A rebuke is more effective when permitted. Our walls of self-defense are only lowered voluntarily.
- If possible, package it with a story. People like to be told stories. Stories shine the light of truth, but rather than a spotlight, are a softer, indirect light.
- Bring it home with a question. Questions are an invitation to participate in the discovery of truth. They give dignity.
- Affirm the person. Affirmation is like cauterizing a wound. It prevents the infection of further lies like, "I'm bad."
*Luke 7:39